Life Update: Lessons From Maternity Leave & Manifesting Our Next Level Family Vision

Nov 30

I’m back!

It’s my first episode since returning from maternity leave and it feels good to be back behind the mic.

This was the longest break I’ve taken from recording episodes since I started the podcast back in February 2021.

It’s been about 3 months since I’ve personally been in the podcasting chair BUT you’ve still been hearing from me every fortnight. I hope you’ve enjoyed the guest interviews that I pre recorded for you before going on maternity leave.

And… I’ve had a baby!

A beautiful little boy named Hugo George. I have been trying to soak up every minute I can of the newborn phase because I know just how quick it goes.

There’s also been A LOT happening in my world. I’m in a big season of transition right now and I want to take this opportunity, in this first episode after maternity leave, to share some reflections and lessons from this time.

And I want to do that because it’s honestly been so amazing. If you follow me over on Instagram you may have heard me say this already but I do really feel like I’m living IN my vision board right now.

So on today’s episode of the Feminine Fire podcast I’m sharing my biggest lessons from maternity leave and how you can apply these lessons in YOUR business.

I’ll also be answering YOUR questions about my maternity leave experience and sharing a bit of a life update – talking about the big shifts that are happening in my world right now.

Ooh, it is gonna be a juicy one!

So to kick things off, I have 3 lessons from maternity leave that I want to share with you.

And I want to preface this by saying that most of these lessons aren’t new. I’m not sharing anything particularly groundbreaking. I didn’t really have any big lightbulb moments but rather a deepening of what I already knew to be true, a deeper embodiment of what it means to truly live by and embody these lessons.

The first lesson is one I talk about all the time – the power of SURRENDER.

This was a big theme for me, particularly in the lead up to Hugo’s birth.

If I’m completely honest, my final few months of pregnancy were definitely NOT what I envisioned.

Between getting covid, losing my voice for more than 6 weeks, a sinus infection, a sprained rib plus all the usual discomforts that come with late pregnancy like puffy ankles, difficulty sleeping, all of the things…

It’s safe to say that the third trimester totally kicked my ass.

It was not fun to say the least but in hindsight it was kinda, probably, exactly what I needed.

It helped me to recognise just how much pressure I was putting on myself to have my “ideal” version of pregnancy and birth.

My emotions were all tied up in my pregnancy and birth looking, feeling and being a certain way.

And what I realised after a hypnotherapy session was that I was doing exactly what I teach my clients NOT to do – I was holding on far too tightly to my vision and trying to control what could not be controlled. When what I really needed to do was surrender.

Surrender is one of the most supportive things you can do for your own mental health in pregnancy and birth, and of course, as a parent too.

The same is true in business. Trust, surrender, have a vision but don’t hold on too tightly. It’s something that I remind my clients of ALL the time.

Trying to control what you can’t control is so incredibly human but so obviously pointless. It is the definition of setting yourself up for failure and disappointment.

Sometimes you don’t even realise you’re doing it. But when you can instead surrender to what will be and fully trust that you can handle whatever it is thrown at you, you can release that control, let go of that pressure, relax, become more mindful, and be more present. Your nervous system, your mental health will thank you for it.

It doesn’t mean that challenges won’t happen but it does mean that you’ll be better equipped to deal with it. And if there’s anything that being a parent to a newborn AND a toddler teaches you, it’s that you can do incredibly challenging things on very little sleep. Ha!

To take this lesson and apply it to YOUR life and business, the questions to ask yourself are:

Where might you be holding unrealistic expectations of yourself or your business?
Where might you be trying to control what is out of your control?
Where might you be holding on to your vision to the detriment of your nervous system and mental wellbeing?
What would it mean to release that control and those expectations?
How would it feel to trust and surrender?

The second lesson is the power of OUTSOURCING & DELEGATING.

For context, I’ve had at least one team member supporting me in the biz for the last few years. And in that time, I’ve learnt to outsource and delegate more and more.

I think as someone who worked on their own for so long AND is a self confessed recovering control freak, it took me a little while to relinquish control and get good at outsourcing and delegating. It’s definitely a skill being able to do that effectively, and I’ve gotten better and better at it as time has gone on.

So I wanted to use this maternity leave as an opportunity to outsource and delegate even more to my team.

For example, prior to mat leave, I had pretty much always maintained my own social media presence and most of my Instagram content was either created in the moment or at the very most, planned within the week. Batching content has never been my strong point.

But one of the things I wanted to test and play with while on maternity leave was batching and handing over more of my socials to my team. This required creating a plan, batching the content and then handing it over to be scheduled and shared.

What we’ll be doing over the next couple of weeks is reviewing how it all went and then refining and creating a plan moving forward for the new year. And I’m actually feeling super jazzed about creating content in this way and continuing to hand over the things in the business that I don’t need to be doing.

What’s really great is to have come back from maternity leave with this already set up, so I am now more in my zone of genius than ever before – which means I’ve got more space to show up and serve my clients, more space to be creative, more space to be strategic AND more time with my family, which is really important to me in this season of my life.

The takeaway here?

Outsourcing and delegating is the BEST for many many reasons. But don’t feel like you have to have ALL your shit together in order to bring on a team member or start outsourcing.

You can start small and with the things in your business that are easiest for you to handover, and then continue to build from there. If this recovering control freak can learn to let go of control, so can you. And your business will thank you for it.

The third lesson is the power of PLANNING.

I went into maternity leave with a PLAN and it made life so much easier. It took the pressure off having to make last minute decisions. As a team, we had a plan, we stuck to the plan and we made small tweaks as needed.

If you’re going to take any time away from your business, you need a plan. Plain and simple. Even if the plan is to take a full break away from everything, that’s still a plan. You need a plan and then you need to communicate that plan with your team, your clients and your community.

For me, having a plan meant that both my team and I were super clear on what needed to happen and when. It meant that we were able to pre-sell spots into the Spiritual Business Mistressmind so the pressure was off in terms of sales when I returned to work.

Having a plan meant that the team were able to hold down the fort and keep the business running with very minimal oversight from me during that time.

It meant that:

My clients knew exactly what to expect in terms of when I was wrapping up and when I was returning to work so they could plan around it.
I had money rolling in each week from payment plans and evergreen sales despite me not being present in the business much at all.
When I did return to work I already had some incredible clients signed up to coach with me and the business was set up in a way that allowed me to return in what has felt like a very gentle, easeful way.

None of this would have been possible without a plan.

The takeaway?

Planning equals more ease, more income, more profit, more fun, more flow, a better experience for your clients, a better team dynamic and culture, all of the above.

Planning is essential for your business growth.

So those were my 3 biggest lessons from maternity leave – surrender, outsourcing & delegating, and planning.

As I said, all things that I already knew, but have been able to embody more deeply through this maternity leave.

Now to answer your questions…

What have the challenges been?

Business-wise, there gratefully haven’t been many challenges. And that’s thanks to having excellent team support and a solid plan going into maternity leave.

I think personally the biggest challenge has been recalibrating to doing business with a newborn again. I did it with Noah but it feels like a million years ago so I’m still finding my rhythm with it. And I know from experience that as soon as I find my rhythm, Hugo will likely change what he’s doing anyway. Ha!

Hugo also isn’t at an age just yet where he’s settled into super regular nap times which makes planning anything quite challenging. The juggle is real – and even when he does have a nap, you never really know whether it’ll be 45 mins or 2 hours. I know other mums will be nodding along with me here!

Gratefully, I’ve got the support of my parents who have stepped in to hang out with Hugo for an hour here or there during the day when I have a call scheduled. And the plan once he’s a little bit older is for my parents to look after him for one day a week, the same as they do for Noah.

So I would say that has been the biggest challenge – just finding my groove as a mama to a newborn again.

The next question is…

What has felt easy?

And the answer is…so so much! I actually feel like my coaching has never been more on point or potent – like I am on fire! Whenever I’m on a call with my clients or in Voxer supporting them, I just feel so laser focused on exactly what they need.

And I’ve always been someone who likes to cut the fluff and get straight to the point, no fucking around the edges, all of those things, but I feel even more of that fire right now and even more focused on supporting my clients to stay on track with their goals and what they want to create in their business.

And that has just felt like a natural shift, a deeper embodiment of my coaching style, maybe it’s the fierce mama bear coming out stronger now that I’m a mum of 2? I don’t know, but getting back into the coaching seat has definitely felt SO easy.

I’m also feeling so energised and excited about the business. Having that time away has definitely re-energised my passion for this work.

When I remember to let go and surrender to this season that I’m in, then it’s all very easy. I’m letting it be easy. In fact, that’s pretty much a prerequisite for anything I’m doing in the business at this time. I don’t have time for complicated. So easy is a must.

Okay. The final question is…

Did you feel ready to return to work when you did?

Yes and no.

Firstly, yes – because I was feeling so ready and so excited to get back into coaching.

To catch up with my continuing clients and see where they were at, to dive in with my new clients and get to know them and their businesses. To just be in my own space, doing something outside of being a mum. To start putting my ideas and plans into practice, continue building the business and making the vision a reality. I was just so excited to dive back into it all.

But at the same time, no – because time literally feels like it’s slipping through my fingers.

Even though I have been so mindful of being present and soaking in all the newborn cuddles with Hugo, those first 2 months before returning to work disappeared so fast.

And now he’s already 3 months! My little newborn is now not so newborn and I don’t think I’ll ever be ready for that. I’m torn between wanting to know what human he’s going to grow into AND keeping him my baby forever. There’s a reason people always say “they grow up too fast” – because they really really do. And going back to work meant that those 2 months had already flown by.

A little life update…

The other thing that kinda threw a spanner in the works was that at the same time as I was returning to work, we also decided to sell our house.

So let me give you some background and a little life update. Very excitingly, we are moving to the coast at the end of this year!

For those of you who don’t know, I’m currently based in Canberra, Australia. Ngunnawal Country. This is my hometown, I’m a Canberran born and bred, and I do really really love this city. But moving our little family to the coast and living near the ocean and going to the beach everyday has been something that Matt and I have been dreaming of and working towards for a little while now… and it’s finally happening!

We found out while I was on maternity leave that Matt had successfully secured a job in the area that we were hoping to move to and then everything kinda snowballed from there.

We’ve now sold our house. Yay! Which means we can now chill over the holiday season, we won’t have to worry about getting the house ready for sale in January, we can just enjoy the summer AND we’re not in any rush to buy a house straight away, we can stay with Matt’s parents while we find our dream house.

It was definitely worth the very full on and slightly chaotic few weeks we had getting the house ready, keeping it clean for open homes, all while navigating life with a newborn and a toddler AND returning to work after mat leave. We don’t do anything in halves over here!

So it’s been a big season but I am just so excited to be living into our next level family vision right now. I told you I was literally living IN my vision board right now. It’s true. What a bloody dream!

And with that, beautiful humans, I have come to the end of this episode today. I hope you enjoyed it and took something away from the lessons I shared and my answers to your questions.

Honestly 12 months ago life and business felt hard more often than not, and I couldn’t see how any of what I’ve shared today could be possible for me. But I kept holding the vision and taking the necessary steps to get me here…and now here we are, and it’s fucking great! So please take this as evidence if you need that it’s possible. Your dreams are possible.

And if you’re about to head into a BIG season yourself, maybe you’re heading off on maternity leave or you’re moving house and cities too or you’re just navigating a whole lot – you’ve got this! I believe in you.

Sending you so much love. Thank you for tuning in today.

If you enjoyed this episode, please come and let me know on Instagram at @bec.cuzzillo – send me a DM. I absolutely love getting your messages about the podcast and knowing which episodes you’re loving.

Bec Cuzzillo